As I held my daughter’s hand during her final breath, I felt both sadness and relief. My beautiful girl was gone, and her pain ended. It’s hard to be a mom to a dead child, but today is especially hard.
Five and a half years after being diagnosed with bowel cancer, my daughter, Dame Deborah James, passed away at 40. It’s still hard to believe she’s gone. Deborah was diagnosed in 2016 at 35, with two young children. Her diagnosis was devastating, but she remained determined to raise awareness about cancer and its symptoms, co-hosting a podcast, writing for The Sun, and advocating for early screenings.
In her final weeks, she moved in with us, and we shared precious moments together, planning movie nights and even an engagement party. I promised to be there for her kids. When she passed, I held her hand, glad her last moments were peaceful.
In the year after her death, I kept busy to distract from the grief, but eventually faced it with therapy and antidepressants. Despite missing Deborah, especially on milestones like birthdays and weddings, her spirit lives on through her children and the awareness she raised.